PEOPLE FORGET WHAT YOU SAY AND DO BUT NOT HOW YOU MAKE THEM FEEL, SO EVERY GOOD COUNSELOR MUST ACQUIRE THESE SKILLS IF THEY ARE GOING TO BE SUCCESSFUL.
Whether you're studying to be a counselor or just thinking about the idea, certain skills are needed if counseling is going to be effective. The most important focus of counseling is helping the client to manage their problems and achieve their goals. Learning these skills and practicing them often will ensure a comfortable and successful counseling experience for both the client and the counselor.
Unconditional Positive Regard
According to Carl Rogers, unconditional positive regard for the client means supporting and accepting the person, no matter what he or she says or does. It means keeping the client's best interest at heart, even when the client may be difficult to deal with or may be taking part in actions you don't support. The first rule of counseling is do not harm and having unconditional positive regard will ensure that harm doesn't happen.Respect
It said, respect is the foundational value of counseling. Without it, the counseling process is likely to fail. Respect is not just an attitude we have towards someone; it is also a way of talking and acting. Respect is shown to someone when we honor a person through word or deed just for who they are, and it involves honoring their rights too.Empathic Understanding
Showing empathy to clients as they tell their stories is vital because it lets clients know that the counselor is actively listening and engaged in what they are saying and encourages clients to continue speaking. Egan says that empathic understanding involves temporary living the other person's life by setting aside our own concerns and seeing things from the client's point of view while still remaining objective. When we are empathetic with a client, we are able to feel their pain in our hearts, and this gives us better knowledge of how to counsel them and meet their needs.Equality
With clients walking though the door from many different backgrounds and ethnicities, it's necessary to treat each and every client equally regardless of where they come from. Equality means giving each client what he or she needs, so counselors may have to put a little more effort into sessions with multicultural patients in order to achieve the same quality of understanding. It said that along with equality also comes accepting and appreciating diversity. Clients will not feel comfortable in a session if they are being treated unfairly.Genuineness
When counselors are genuine with clients that means they are being real with their clients and informing them accurately about the helping process. It believed that genuineness is one of the important factors required to help people grow. Counselors need to be real and honest with clients in order for clients to see how they need to change and start making the steps to do so. Counselors need to be willing to be open with their clients and not afraid to challenge them when appropriate.
Active Listening
Active listening does not just involve hearing the words someone speaks. But it also involves hearing the message a person is speaking and reading the emotions and nonverbal messages that are imbedded within. Counselors can become better listeners by putting in a conscious effort to understand the entire message that is found in and behind the words.Collaboration
The helping process is a joint effort. The counselor does not do all of the work, and neither does the client. It said that collaboration means the counselor and client work together to accomplish the client's goals. Both counselor and client have responsibilities to carry out in order for the counseling to be effective.Patience
Not all clients are going to be easy to handle. Some will be reluctant and resistant and not want to take part in the helping process. Some may feel uncomfortable and need more time to build a trusting relationship with the counselor before any valuable work can be done. Some clients progress through the counseling process quicker than others, so counselors must be patient and flexible with clients because no one is the same.Guiding Not Telling
A counselor should never tell a client what to do. If this occurs, a helper is not counseling. Counselors are to guide the client and help them see possibilities and options. No matter how much you would like for a client to change, the choice is always the client’s. Autonomy is the freedom of the client to choose his or her path, and as professionals, counselors must respect the client’s choices, whether a counselor agrees with them or not.Relatability
This involves being able to get along and cooperate well with other people. Counseling often fails when clients are not able to relate or get along with the counselor. Counselors must be able to be relatable if a trusting relationship is going to be formed.Compassion/Sympathy
Showing compassion or sympathy to someone expresses care and concern. Having compassion means we are sensitive to the needs and feelings of others. This is fundamental in the counseling process because people come into the office broken and hurt wanting someone to care. Counselors can begin creating a trusting relationship with the client if they are sympathetic to what the client is feeling. Expressing compassion can also put the client at ease and increase their comfort level.These are the skills to succeed in counseling. Learn them well and you will go far in this career.
